Hot...Seriously Hot

Well, I made it to FL safe and sound!!  But can I tell you it is HOT down here, like seriously  hot.  I do not remember this humidity being like this, but I guess I will get used to it.  My flights were good, no problems.  In fact I have to tell ya'll something.  It is kind of embarassing but this blog is all about being honest.  I have not been able to buckle an airplane seatbelt comfortably in years.  I would have to suck in with all my might for it to buckle and then it would dig into my hips and stomach and hurt the entire flight.  Yesterday I was able to buckle the seatbelt and be comfortable.....yea!!  I almost started crying, then I realized that the crazy dog lady next to me might freak out and I don't want to kicked off a plane for something like that!!! 

I am having so much fun with my family!!  I have been here for only a day and half and my mom and I have laughed so much in that short period of time.  I love it!!!  I found a cute shirt to wear with a pair of khaki pants I have to my brothers graduation, but we are going shopping tomorrow and I saw a commercial where everything in LB is 40% off, so I might end up getting that cute dress I saw....who knows! 

There was other stuff I wanted to say, but it's 4:14 am and I can't sleep and am not thinking straight, so I am sure I will be be posting a ton of pictures and other random stuff during my trip!!

All Clear and Flying

Well, I got the all clear from my doc today.  I can officially walk!!!  I have no foot pain, however my hip and calf are really sore.  He said that is normal and should go away in a few days.  He said that I don't have to come back unless I have any issues. 

I am not even close to being packed yet.  We are leaving the house at 8:00 am and instead of blogging I should be packing, however I rate packing up there with doing the dishes....I hate it.  Plus I am all paranoid that I am going to go over the 50 lb weight limit with my suitcase and have to pay a butt load of money.  Oh well, c'est la vie!

I will talk to ya'll from the Sunshine State!!

Random

Hello Ladies!  (I don't think I have any guy followers)

I feel like a slacker blogger.  I just don't feel like my life has justifed a post lately, however that has changed today!! 

I have decided that since I am getting my boot off on Monday a few days is not going to hurt, so I have started walking on it.  I don't want to get it off on Monday and hobble along like a weirdo when I am down in FL.  Also, I want to walk on it so if I have any problems I can tell the Dr. on Monday.  At least that is my reasoning!   I cannot tell you how wonderful it feels to be mobile again.  I know my husband loves not having to carry everything for me!!

I was able to get some free tickets to a golf tournament here in B'ham today.  My dad LOVES golf, so it was nice to be able for us to go.  I completely sunburnt my face and arms.  I put sunscreen on, but dang it was HOT.  It was fun and Dad had a great time, so that is what matters to me. 

After the golf tournament I wanted to stop by a new Target that opened up about 6 months ago.  They seem to have a larger clothes area than by the one where I live.  I am so glad we stopped!!  I am happy to tell you that I have dropped another pants size!!!  This little tidbit has made my weekend!!!  I found the cutest pair of capri's and a shirt.  Normally Target shirts do not fit me.  I carry a lot of my weight in the middle so I should say they fit but they look horrible.  But not today!! I found a cute little purple shirt and it fit nicely :)  Then we stopped by Kohl's and I found a great purse and some perfume on clearance.....score! 

We stopped by Lane Bryant so I could look at bras and maybe a dress for my brothers graduation.  I found the cutest dress, but I could not justify spending $50.00 on a dress that I would wear a few times and then be too big on me.  This leads me to an obstacle I am trying to overcome.  It has taken me a while to get the weight loss going, but right now it seems to be on a roll and I like it.  But when I was in Target and LB I automatically went for the size I was for a long time.  I am having a hard time getting my mind wrapped around the fact that I am shrinking.  I tried the dress on in LB and asked the girl who worked there her opinion (I was alone).  She said it was cute, but too big.  She got me the next size down and I immediately thought there was no way it was going to fit or look nice.  Sure enough I put it on and it fit like a glove.  I was amazed, but why?  I mean logic states that I lose 42 lbs (oh yeah, I weighed myself this afternoon and I have lost 2 more lbs....yea!!!)  and I will wear smaller clothes.  I am just having a hard time getting my mind around that.  Granted it's a good problem to have, but still. 

I can't wait until Tuesday, I fly down to FL and get to see my family.  I have not seen them since January...way to long!! 

Late version of BYOC

1. If you could be a cartoon character – who would you be and why?
I would be Cinderella.  She has always been my favorite!

2. Who was your teenage heart throb?
Ooohh......Mark Wahlberg and Donnie Wahlberg.  Mark Wahlberg had the whole bad boy thing going for him....HOT!  He is still hot!  And I loved me some NKOTB back in the day!! 

3. Do you believe being overweight is about a mental obstacle or do you believe it’s simply about overeating/food?
I believe it's both. 

4. What’s your all-time favorite song?
Draz I hate to be a copy cat, but it's Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton.  It was my wedding song and it makes me cry every time I hear it.  I LOVE this song.

5. Whose blog or comment spoke to you/stuck with you this week and why? This is our “you get to be famous for a moment” without having to follow all the rules of an official blog award question.
Definitely Mary's about having children.  It struck me in a deep place.

40!!

I weighed myself this morning and I am down 40.2 lbs!!!  Hopefully people will start noticing a difference now :) 

That is all for now.

Hoarding, Security & Weight

I was watching a show on TLC the other day and was shocked.  Some of ya'll have probably seen it - Hoarding: Buried Alive.  I was shocked at the pain that this one lady was going through.  She was a single mom to a teenage son and she was holding onto things from when he was a baby.  I understand holding onto a few things, but anything that her son had ever had she kept.  She also had a lot of other crap, but her pain and emotion was tied to his stuff.  She explained it to her doctor that it was a security for her to have this stuff around.  When she said that something went off in my head, food is my security.  This lady collects stuff and hoards it to make her feel better and I eat to make myself feel better.  Now I had known eating = security for me, but to actually see someone going through essentially the same thing but with stuff, it all made sense in my mind.  Does that sound crazy? 

It made me realize that I did not become this fat overnight and the weight is not going to fall off of me overnight.  It also made me realize that I have to put a lot more effort in the mental aspect of losing weight than I have been.  I have been so focused on the physical aspect I have kind of ignored the mental.  Since seeing that show everytime I pick something up to eat it I mentally think if I really need it or not.  It sounds simple, but to actually implement the task is hard.  It's like the hoarding lady, she eventually cleaned her house and got rid of a lot of stuff but her doctor told her from now on when she wants to keep something to ask herself if she really NEEDED it or not. 

So far so good.  I know I am going to run into roadblocks and will slip from time to time but it's ok.  It's all part of the process. 

BYOC

1) Do you have any nicknames?

I get called Kimmy alot.  Since my brother was born, my mom, step-dad and brother all call me sis or sissy.  I don't really like it, but I roll with it.  My husband calls me baby or babydoll, rarely does he call me Kim or Kimberly. 

2) What was your "last straw"? The incident/situation that made you decide to get a lap band or commit to losing weight via any plan this time?

I knew that I wanted this surgery for a while, but I think it was when the doctor told me I could get pregnant, but it would not be an easy pregnancy for me or the baby.  I think she was just trying to be nice.  I personally don't think I could get pregnant with how much I weighed.  Also, I saw a picture of myself and was SHOCKED.  In my mind I was not nearly as big as I thought.  It was a huge wake up call for me.  After I saw that picture I cried and cried and then started the process to get this surgery.

3) What's your favorite joke or funny story?

My dad told me this joke on one of his weekends when I was a little girl.  When he told me this joke, I laughed and laughed.  Growing up only seeing my dad every other weekend he always tried to make me smile and happy because I hated leaving him at the end of the weekend.  Sorry to get all sappy on the BYOC, but this joke is kind of special to me for that reason.   And if this offends anyone, I am sorry.  It is not meant to offend anyone any way. 

Three workers, a German man, a French man and a Chinese man, were dropped off in a mine to start work.  The supervisor told the German guy he was in charge of picking the coal off the wall.   He then told the French guy he was in charge of sweeping up the coal that fell on the floor.  He told the Chinese guy he was in charge of supplies.  So all three men started working and 2 hours later the supervisor came back.  The German guy was picking away, the French guy was sweeping furiously but he could not find the Chinese man.  All of the sudden the Chinese man jumped up from behind a few boxes and yells....."SUPPLIES!!!"

Funny, huh?!!

Also, anytime I get together with my mom I laugh until my stomach hurts....literally.  I love you mama, but you do some crazy stuff sometimes!!!  We have so much fun together. We get each other's sense of humor so it makes it easy!!

4) If you could be a TV dinner - what flavor would you be?

I would be Boston Market's sweet potato casserole.  I love that stuff!!!

5) The question we do every week so everyone can be a little famous without having to do an official blog award...what blog or comment stuck with you or spoke to you the most this week and why?

Everyone's comments on my last post.  I am kind of down in the dumps and everyone was so encouraging!!  Draz - you and I talked off the blog and thank you....it meant so much!

Nervous and a Bit Ashamed

I have 2 weeks and 1 day before I am down in FL and seeing my family, I am so excited....for the most part.  There is this one little part of me that is very nervous and a bit ashamed.  I am nervous because I have lost 38 lbs (and hopefully more in the next 2 weeks) but I don't think anyone will notice.  My dad says he can tell, but he's my dad.  I don't think he would lie to me, however I think he wants to make me feel good.  I can't tell visually, but I can tell in my clothes and rings.  I am a bit ashamed because I think I have let people down.  I know that sounds crazy, but it's how I feel.  I can't change that.  I am ashamed that I have not lost more than I have.  Why is it so hard for me to be happy with where I am?  Slow and steady is better, right?  I am in NO WAY disappointed with the surgery or my decision and I don't want ya'll to think I am being stupid about this, but I can't help compare myself to other people.  I know I shouldn't and I really try hard not to, but sometimes I can't help it.  I know that 38 lbs is nothing to sneeze at, I know my organs are getting healthier, I know that it's all good.  I am seeing friends and actually an old boss who knows I have had the surgery and I am just afraid they are going to not see any difference.  It's really hard right now because I can't exercise, but in the next 2 weeks I am going to drink so much water and eat so good.  I am going to try and lose at least 10 lbs before FL.....wish me luck!

Throwback Saturday Night

I was going through some of my pictures and found these from high school.  Back then I thought I was such a heifer....if I only knew!!  Kristen had posted this week about having inspiration pictures and these are mine.  I would love to get back to my high school weight.  Looking back at these, I don't think I was too bad looking.

What is my deal with my mouth being open in both of these pics?!

 

Oh yes, I was on the drill team for one year in high school before I tore my ACL and had to quit.....but I ROCKED those gold sequins for that year!!!  Seriously though, who in their right mind would pick white spandex and gold sequin tatas for a dance uniform?!  And that is not my man hand in the picture...it is of the girl next to me!!

For the longest time all I would focus on in this picture is of the ACL scar on my knee....now I don't give a crap about it. It is what makes me me!!